Naughty List Nog: The Boozy Holiday Treat For Skanks

If Christmas were a cocktail, it would be the Naughty List Nog—creamy, dreamy, and just naughty enough to keep you warm through the season. I mean, who doesn’t love creamy things? I know I do. This Baileys-based drink is rich, indulgent, and unapologetically festive. It’s like a holiday sweater for your taste buds: cozy, but with a spicy twist.

Let’s not kid ourselves—store-bought eggnog doesn’t stand a chance next to this homemade gem. Spiced rum adds a kick, whipped cream brings the fluff, and Baileys? Well, that’s just the cherry on top of this boozy dessert in a glass. And like I said in my Ho-Ho-Holiday Margarita recipe, we’re fancy bitches, alright? Whether you’re sipping by the fire or at the annual Christmas swinger orgy, this cocktail screams “holiday vibes.”

Make one for yourself or whip up a batch for your next holiday gang bang—just don’t forget to garnish like a profesh. After all, every drink deserves its close-up.

The Naughty List Nog

Rosemary

Santa’s not checking this list twice—this is the holiday cocktail for the ones who’ve been just a little bad. Creamy, dreamy, and loaded with just the right amount of buzz, this Baileys-based concoction is what every cozy winter night deserves. Forget the store-bought eggnog; we’re making a spiked holiday masterpiece.

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Total Time 5 minutes mins

Course Drinks

Servings 1 people

Calories 400 kcal

Equipment

• 1 Mug
• 1 Cocktail Shaker

Ingredients

  

• 2 oz Baileys Irish Cream Smooth and creamy. We like creamy, remember?
• 1 oz Spiced Rum Because we're here for a good time, okay?
• 1 oz Milk or Heavy Cream We're going to want to stick with at least whole milk here for optimum creamy goodness. Go with heavy whipping cream if you want to go the extra mile. After all that hoing around you've been doing, you deserve the extra calories.
• 1/2 tsp Ground Nutmeg This is mostly just for added holiday cheer and all that bullshit.
• Whipped Cream Seriously, do not skip this part. This is what makes it look so festive and fancy. you get extra points if you make the whipped cream yourself, but I won't judge you too much if you use the canned stuff. But you'll be less of a fancy bitch if you do. And I'll judge you a little bit.
• Garnish Go with cinnamon sticks and grated nutmeg. Again, we are fancy bitches around here. How many times do I need to say this?

Instructions

 

• Shake it like you mean it: Toss Baileys, spiced rum, milk, and a sprinkle of nutmeg into a cocktail shaker with ice. Shake like you're trying to burn off that cock you just gobbled up.
• Pour with flair: Strain into a rocks glass over fresh ice, or if you’re feeling indulgent, pour it into a festive mug for those cozy vibes.
• Top it off: Pile on the whipped cream like your life depends on it. Sprinkle a little nutmeg or add a cinnamon stick for bonus points.
• Sip and savor: Kick back, sip slowly, and laugh in the face of your calorie count. It’s the holidays—don't fucking worry about calories, okay?

Notes

Pro Tip:

Double the recipe and serve it in a pitcher at your next holiday gathering. Or keep it all for yourself—I won’t judge.

This is the kind of cocktail that feels like a warm hug with a little smack on the ass. It’s indulgent, festive, and just naughty enough to keep things interesting. Kinda like me in a Christmas sweater and no pants. Cheers to spiked holiday bliss! 🎄🍹

 

 

Keyword Cocktails, Holiday Cocktails, Holiday Recipes